With all of this rain, i have officially melted into darkness...and i love it here. Receptivity reveals and nourishes. Since Ireland, my cells feel more earthed. They have remembered their earthy essence. I have spent many moments this winter meshing with the darkness. Pause. Look within. Even with eyes wide open, staying close to myself. How can we relax again and again into doing non-doing (in the moments between the doing) and allow... allow what is to be revealed? Like a seed, it is in the depths of darkness where we receive guidance from our inner most fire. Our hearth fire. Our Home. The point of directed light, knowing, bright in the darkness. Pure potential from the wuji, the void, the compost of life. Relax and open to authenticity.
Around the winter solstice, the muck came back. The mud and earth we sopped through in Ireland, and the contemplations I had then returned. The aspect of darkness that conceals, or is unclear ... that is Obscurity ~ the quality of darkness that can obscure crept in. Certain relationshiops became muddled. Communications and intentions, foggy. I felt a sense of isolation and disconnection i hadn't felt in awhile. In relationship with many, but unseen. The muck. There it is. Here I am in it. Ah yes. Sure something to look at here. What's going on?
But I am a Cancerian, a crab. I know how to hide in the sand and find clarity from the sun glinting off a grain.
So i pulled back, softened and asked... You know, actually, is muck really a seperate aspect of yin? Or just one in the same... intuitive... receptive... Much is revealed in obscurity as well. And if one releases any pretense, all judgement falls away, of self and other. All is Is-ness. Like taking a mud bath, once you scrub it all off, your skin glows. Understanding dawns. Although mud is often univited and challenging, it too serves a purpose. Holding life sap in its mineral-rich lap.
Recently I have felt my fire blase again in a phase of emergence: in the lift the heart and say Yes kind of way, "i can do this." The sustainance is family, singing, community... and yes the ancient wisdom medicine of qigong::: Ancient technology of saving grace. A lifeline of Universal Qi that simultaneously feeds and grounds the strong fire of our times, inner and outer. Empty your mind, fill your belly. Hearth fire, strong and stable, clings to our core and reveals our story. Whatever your practice is, however it is that you explore your dark, quiet places and nurture your flame, commit to it! Listen in. Commit to yourself.
The Dao inherently askes you to stay humble, traverse to the low places. Yin nourishes yang. Valley spirit. And from there we invite the rising sun, the valley cupping gently its orb of pure potential